G’s Official Recap of TNA Impact (January 16, 2014)

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In 2002, all things TNA got started in Alabama…skip ahead 12 years to today and we find ourselves back in Alabama as all things TNA set up to start a new again. Not wanting to waste her time giving a title to the time before today, Dixie Carter is ready to move forward and play things her way all era long…a new TNA time she has deemed the Magnus Era. Magnus, who is wearing a single breasted jacket along with double the number of TNA World Heavyweight Championship belts, shows his thanks to his boss by bestowing one of those belts for her to call her own.

Pushing the thank you scheme one step further, Dixie graciously and whole-deservingly accepts the championship belt from Magnus prior to inviting everyone who helped her and Magnus accomplish their joint defeat of AJ Styles last week into the ring. Now with everyone who had a hand in last week’s main event in the ring at the same time, Dixie acknowledges them all for their individually small parts last week while promising them that her thanks will be evidenced via their paycheques in the weeks to come.

Alas, her boat of thankfulness did not stop there. With what she had deemed her TNA team in her ring with her, the TNA owner wanted everyone to welcome one more member of Team Dixie to the ring…she directed everyone in the ring, everyone in the crowd, and everyone watching at home to welcome everyone’s favourite nephew … Ethan Carter the 3rd. Luckily for everyone, EC3 was only given enough time to make it the ring and be handed microphone before the lights went out to reveal Sting standing proud in the crowd, confidence and determination in hand by way of a trademarked, black baseball bat.

Sting starts his raging review of Dixie Carter’s plans for her “Magnus Era” by casting more doubt and disbelief in how this has soiled the good name of TNA as a whole and Magnus as an individual. Not being the kind of person who backs down from something that already looks to be in her favour, Dixie pushes back onto Sting how he seems to be all alone against everyone else in the ring with her.

“Look again, Dixie!” is all Sting as to say before a charge to the ring consisting of Samoa Joe, ODB, James Storm, Gunner, Eric Young, and Joseph Park. The rush of Sting and his associates makes quick work of Dixie’s crew and causes a slight uproar in more than just Dixie’s bonnet – which is meant to be resolved when Rockstar Spud pulls a referee from out of the backstage area and demands that a 12 person tag match start RIGHT NOW…!

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Match  1.

Team Dixie ((DJ Zema, Lel D’Tapa, Christopher Daniels, Kazarian, Robbie E, and Jessie Godderz))

-vs-

Team Sting ((Samoa Joe, ODB, James Storm, Gunner, Eric Young, Joseph Park))

For most of the match it seemed as though each member from both sides had an equal dancing partner; Zema got twisted and twirled by Samoa Joe, Lel D’Tapa and ODB struck a few chords off each other, Daniels went a few rounds with Storm, Kazarian tried to handle Gunner, Robbie E was let wild versus Young, and Jessie tip-toed around with Park. The climax came to a point when Joseph Park was made to see red thanks to Kazarian bringing blood onto the dance floor which unleashed the beast from within. And after beast mode was culled out of the ring, Samoa Joe took Daniels to the mat and got the win via another never-before-seen submission.

Winner: Team Sting wins via submission.

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After seeing his girl sneaking another chat with the enemy, Sabin forces himself and Velvet Sky to the ring. From there, he labels his girlfriend as being selfish – relating this to how she has been trying to secretly talk behind his back with, of all people, Austin Aries. No longer needing to hide or sneak around this Austin Aries out to join the couple in the ring, starts to over-compliment Velvet much to Sabin’s dismay, and finishes with challenging Sabin for his title…and maybe even his girl.

At first, Sabin outright declines the challenge but is just as quickly overturned when Velvet Sky accepts the challenge as well as the clause which will have her caged at ringside, forcing Sabin to handle the whole thing on his own…which if he is unsuccessful may cost him more than just his TNA X-Division Championship. Then she walks out leaving the two wrestlers on their own.

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We quietly come across Ethan Carter 3rd talking to himself in the mirror, trying to mentally prepare himself for his match against Sting later on in the evening. Magnus decides that when he comes across this same scene not to be quiet but to be loud and voice his assessment of what he sees.

He sees a rookie doing rookie things.

He sees a young up and comer trying to preparing himself against a man who is still high and mighty.

He sees someone who, if they were actually able to perform to the best of expectations, just might one day be the champion that Magnus is today.

After peppering his supposed team mate with doubt and speculations, Magnus leaves a seemingly more humbled Carter alone with his thoughts and his mirror.

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Match  2.

No Disqualification

Bully Ray              -vs-        Mr. Anderson

Anderson does not care enough to wait for the bell as he attacks Ray while he is still making his way to the ring. From there, Ray is battered and bruised at all four outer sides of the ring prior to being thrown into the ring calling for the match to officially be underway. A second and third wind gained by both men through the rest of match brings us to witness dueling chair shots, clotheslines, more chair shots, garnished guardrail uses, shared chain jolts, and a barrage of near falls and two counts. When Bully Ray threatens to use lighter fluid directly onto his opponent, Anderson reverses the threat and pours out the fluid onto a table previously set up in the ring.

Alas, that is as far as that threat ever goes, this time around. Bully Ray lowers the boom via an otherwise illegal crotch shot. As Anderson tries to find his breath, Bully Ray delivers an ace-like piledriver and rolls away with the win soon after that.

Winner: Bully Ray via pin fall

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We are once again backstage, this time it is Kurt Angle we are following. He has been searching all venues he can backstage to find either Dixie Carter and or Al Snow, to make them both answer for how they used the well being of Angle’s family last week to get him away from the main event.

He finds Al Snow.

He asks Al why he did it.

Al tries to put up his own social defenses to explain his actions from last week but to no avail.

Angle knocks out Snow…and then carries on with the other half of his search.

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Kurt Angle brings his search into the ring and blatantly calls out Dixie. Ms Carter obliges the Olympic gold medal bearer and explains her side of things as her looking out for the best for Angle. She did what she did because Kurt is not smart enough to do what’s best for TNA and himself. Angle answers her judgment with a promise that tonight he will not only do what’s best for TNA and for himself but also what will be best for Sting.

Being able to read between the lines, Dixie decides that what is best now is by her giving Angle the night off and calling for TNA security to escort him out of the building. Not being any easier for security to handle than he was for Dixie, Angle pushes back as much as he can…that is until Bobby Roode rushes the ring and lays out Kurt making for a limp and easy body for security to now sweep out of the arena for the rest of the night.

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Match  3.

TNA Knockouts Championship

Madison Rayne                 -vs-        Gail Kim (with Lel D’Tapa)

Things start off as Kim rushes herself and most of her opponent through several devilishly quick pin attempts, each one ending with razor’s edge two counts. Each two count seems to turn the slow burn within Rayne higher and hotter as both women try to outrage the other, leading to Tapa laying her hands on Madison and giving Kim some time to recollect herself. Unlike most other times though, the zebra officiating this match decides to bar Tapa from ringside for the remainder of match.

Lel D’Tapa being discount and dispelled from her typical readiness to aid the current champion seems to go unnoticed by Gail and she returns to boldly attacking her current challenger. However, the same call to fairness which has caused Kim to fight on her own seems to also be the fire starter that Rayne needed as she rolls up a pin and then rolls out being the new champion.

Winner: Madison Rayne by pin fall; becoming the new TNA Knockout’s Champion.

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Match  #4.

Main Event.

Ethan Carter 3rd         -vs-        Sting

Earlier tonight, we found out that Dixie Carter had given Earl Hebner the night off and promised a surprise referee for the main event. No one was given any clue or notice of who it was going to be until now. With both components firmly in the ring ready to find out who is going to officiate their match and ready to fight each other to the bitter end, we are all surprised to see black and white stripes dawned by … Rockstar Spud. And now with a referee now known by all, we see a start to tonight’s main event.

Referee Spud call Sting out for pulling hair. He calls the Icon for hitting with closed fists. He even calls him for wrestling too well for EC3’s best interest. Since all those calls are being laid against him while inside the ring, Sting decides to take things to the outside of the ring and furiously lays out his challenger with all sorts of pulls, punches, kicks, stomps, and wrestling he can before bringing everyone back into the ring.

Sting locks in a Scorpion Death Lock with great ease and almost brings a tap out before the zebra that is Rockstar decides to take on Sting himself by jumping onto Sting’s back. Alas, even with the dew rag that is a makeshift official clawing atop of him, Sting is still able to fight off Ethan and bring him and Spud onto the back. Sting goes the pin and forcibly makes the referee to call for the pin.

After the two count, referee Spud is pulled out of the ring by a magically reappearing Magnus who after making sure Spud is in the clear reveals himself as being a Dixie appointed referee for the night. This distraction counts for the perfect time to allow Ethan Carter to roll up Sting, which allows Magnus to snap into the and zap down an amazingly fast three count.

Winner: Ethan Carter 3rd via pin pall

The announcement making Ethan Carter 3rd still undefeated in TNA is drummed out by Sting calling out Magnus for once again showing what kind of so-called champion he has become. Sting challenges TNA’s Heavyweight World Champion to a fight for next week, a fight which is eventually accepted but only if one condition is accepted by Sting. If Sting wants his shot at Magnus it will come with the following price tag attached; if Sting wins he gets to be the TNA Heavyweight World Champion but if Magnus wins then Sting has to leave TNA forever.

Challenge: accepted!

Until next week…this is how we are to leave TNA: Genesis.