G’s Official Review of Smackdown (Aired 10 May 2012)

We open up at N.C. State University (home of the Wolf pack – true motto, look it up) to bare witness to “The Highlight Reel” already set up in the ring. The host, Chris Jericho, starts with a small preamble leading to the introduction of his guest for this episode of his segment; Ryback. As a small recap video of “The Animal’s actions from the previous RAW of the week. As incredible waves of muffled boos! Pepper Ryback into the ring, Y2J begins things by saying how he understands why Ryback has been doing what he has been doing; he understands that Ryback’s rules revolves around doing whatever it takes to take whatever he wants.

Jericho recalls how things from then can be compared to things of now. How Jericho beating The Rock and Steve Austin in the same night to become the first unified champion is comparable to Ryback potentially beating a one-legged Cena at “Extreme Rules” for the WWE Championship. How gaining the championship in that manner will cost Ryback all the respect he has left in the WWE Universe.

This burns Ryback quickly and he shows this by questioning what allows Chris from saying these things, what reason he has for thinking that Ryback won’t strike him down where he stands. (Good question…fortunately, there was a good answer to follow). Jericho zestfully states, “Because I’m looking you right in your eye, and you can’t do a damn thing you can do about it.”

Someone who can do something about it does make his way onto the entrance way at that very moment. `the Mack militant’ aka Teddy Long struts out wanting to delay the fuse which has already been tempted to being lit. Things are not going to happen the way Ryback nor the way Jericho wants it to happen. What we are going to have tonight though, claims Smack Down’s assistant to the General Manager, is a main event of Ryback versus Chris Jericho.

That sudden announcement draws Jericho’s eyes away from Ryback…Ryback being the monster he is takes that time to blindside his pending opponent with a monstrous jab to the jaw. Ryback then strides out of the ring as Chris nurses his sore mouth…strangely enough another incredible wave of boos! follow Ryback out of the ring, up the ramp, and into the back.

Match #1

Kofi Kingston (U.S. Champion) -vs- Cody Rhodes

The two professionals start things off with a long winding chorus of chain wrestling which eventually leads to Rhodes taking the lead thanks to his exposed knee meeting Kofi’s mid section and lower back. During the majority of the match, the American Dream Jr does show Kofi and the rest of us what made him the IC Champion months ago. However, due to a blown disaster kick, Kofi shows Rhodes the trouble in paradise – in an up close and personal manner.

Winner: Kofi Kingston via pinfall.


Backstage cameras bring us to an interview with Jack Swagger and, his real-american coach, Zeb Colter. Zeb allows for the drab, typical interviewing to be surpassed as he takes control of both the Q’s and the A’s (that’s short for `questions and answers’). To put it simply, Zeb and Swagger have a two step plan they are about to set into effect starting at the pending pay-per-view,

Step 1: Win the World Championship belt.

Step 2: Win back America.

End of interview


Match #2

Big E Langston -vs- Jack Swagger

To start, one must state that Alberto Del Rio was at ringside with the trio of ring announcers. One must say this because before the match was able to official start, Del Rio slid a steel ladder into the ring and taunted both competitors to use it.

Not wanting to be the first to back down from a challenge, both the World Champion’s heavy hitter (Big E) and the Real American-American (Jack Swagger) grab wildly at opposite ends of the ladder. Their tug of war is holted when, for whatever even God doesn’t know why reason, Zeb Colter punch-slaps Big E’s back. As Lanston expresses his own style of “W-t-F!” face, Swagger uses the ladder to joust the heavy man out the ring. With his man out, Ziggler slides in and brazingly drop kicks the ladder nearly through Swagger.
And now with two men out, Del Rio (the man who introduced the ladder to begin this scramble) enters the ring himself and outright attacks Ziggler, ladder use not included.

With three men out now; Del Rio steadily sets up the ladder at the centre of the ring, claims the championship belt, casually climbs the ladder, and taunts the fallen to what might become truth in 9 days from now – him being the new champion after reaching the top of the ladder and claiming this belt for his own.

Winner: No one; the match never officially got started.


Match #3

Dean Ambrose -vs- Daniel Bryan

No sooner does the beginning bell sound off than does `the flying goat’ that is Bryan starts to hit Ambrose with rounds after rounds of kicks and stomps to Ambrose’s chest, back, chest, back, and chest again. The Beard gets himself a 2-count before an assist by the ring ropes gives Ambrose the lead. Dean knows who is wrestling and still he goes for submissions onto his opponent – to no avail of course. The tables turn again when ‘The World’s Toughest Vegan’ allows Ambrose to meet the ring post quick, hard, and with his manhood leading the way. WWE’s ultimate “Yes – Yes – Yes” man thusly takes his time to show his support for all things naturally by positioning Ambrose into a tree of woe with the same ring post as before – whilst Kane keeps the remaining 2/3’s of The Shield at bay.

Next. One half of the WWE Tag Team Champions brings all things together as he secures the “No Lock” on one third of The Shield. Alas, Kane can only physically discourage one of remaining members not to get involved, which leaves Roman Reigns to enter the ring with the intentions of breaking the lock. Fortunately, his intentions never show fruit thanks to Kofi Kingston charging the ring rushing Reigns out of the ring.

With things now being even, three men for each side, The Shield take what’s left of themselves and leave through the crowd.

Winner: Dean Ambrose via outside interference.


Earlier tonight we were shown how Mark Henry once again proved how strong he is by way of pulling a tractor trailer on his own. And now, we are taken outside of the arena as Mark Henry sets up to do better than himself. ‘The World’s Strongest Man’ is now setting himself for double the wonder and double the amazement for he is now strapped up to two tractor trailers.

And with all that; three giant grunts and two jolted jerks lead to Mark Henry doing what he does…setting a new world record.


Another set up back stage brings us a quick message from Randy Orton.

He asked what he thinks about what has been transpiring between him and his pending “Extreme Rules” opponent, The Big Show. (*Flashback: Big Show knocked Orton out at Wrestlemania and did so again earlier this week on RAW*).

His answer; “The bigger the vermin the bigger the venom!”


Match #4

Big Show -vs- Sweet T

The world’s biggest dancer begins as the aggressor.
Unfortunately, aggression is short lived thanks a sharply connected bear paw (aka WMD) to the side of T’s noggin.

As Brodus Clay tends to his tag partner’s well being, Big Show returns to the ring and lays Ckay out soundly via a big spear. Big Show’s want to follow that up with a second WMD is swept away when Orton strikes the ring and snaps on a RKO to put all other things aside.

Winner: The Big Show via pinfall.

Match #5

Chris Jericho -vs- Ryback

Jericholics cheer and chant Y2J to the ring.

In comparison;

Snarls and jeers crash upon Ryback to the ring.

Looking at one another from across the ring happens before the bell rings, bell rings, and both men go full tilt towards one another. Eventually, Jericho is thrown away to the outside of the ring, he takes his eyes off Ryback, and in return Jericho is smashed into the ringside barricade before being brought back into the ring. Once there, the pressure is keep on by way of smash and crash tactics by Ryback. These pressure tactics do give way to the flare and flam that is Jericho’s quick feet.

Flare equal to Lion Sault (*which leads to a 1 count*) and flam in the way of Walls of Jericho. But that flare does fizzles thanks to Ryback being sent to the outside due to Y2J’s Code Breaker. Chris follows this to the outside where is met with a now severely angered Monster. Enacting upon his own set of rules, and not wanting to give the Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla any more chances, Ryback blatantly rams Jericho (*manhood first*) into the ring post. And even with the match being called, Ryback continues playing on his own set of rules and charges Jericho over and almost through the announcers’ table before marching his way to the back.

This leaves Jericho in tremendous amounts of pain, but in comparison he now owns another win and his first victory over another WWE talent to close out tonight’s broadcast.

Winner: Jericho by pinfall